Jason Purcell


I have kept my life busy and loud and full of work. My eyes don’t look up very often, and when they do they don’t see clearly. I am tired and waiting for quiet moments.

Last night, desperate for sleep, I thought of you and of the emptiness I am trying to ignore, the back of your neck, the curl of your hair, the blue that is your best colour.


You told me I strayed, like I was something fixed to the sky and you were surprised to fall asleep without me shining in my usual spot. It is true that I stood constant in the north for so long, but there are always others orbiting around me who pull me in new and interesting ways. Love is not a law. It is not gravity, it is not always falling, and the apple doesn’t always smash against the earth at the end. Love is spinning around at night. It is dancing, light-footed and free. You told me I strayed, but none of us are ever fixed. We are always turning, falling into one another, colliding and destroying and creating. Orbits end, after millions of years, after two. You told me I strayed, but that is what we do. You do not need to look up at me anymore, scour the dark for my usual place. We have ended, but it was beautiful. Do not blame me.

THE IDOL CLUB has a new album out today, and I’m thrilled to be singing background vocals on one of the tracks.